Strippers turned Celebrities
This is a listing of the Top 5 sexiest strippers turned Celebrities. Some of these celebrities being strippers? Won’t surprise you worth a damn. A couple of them? You will NEVER BELIEVE IT!!
#5. – Ne Ne Leakes
Are they any women in Atlanta who didn’t work that pole in gentleman clubs under the age of 40? We LOVE Atlanta! It’s like the land of Whores, Hip-Hop Tours, and down low black men blowing each other behind closed doors!
# 4 – Courtney Cox Arquette
Hold Up!!! Wait one F*cking minute? Courtney Cox wasn’t a stripper? We just realized that our young intern goofed up the research and who she meant was Courtney Love!
#4 - Courtney Love
Without a doubt, probably THE most dysfunctional woman on the planet. The ex-wife of rock legend, the king of heroin consumption, and the poster child for manic depression, Courtney Love’s soul-mate, Kurt Kobain. Although she was born to a rich well to do family, and privy to all of the finest things in life. Courtney Love turned her back to her life of prestige and excess and gave it all up for love. The love of heroin. Courtney Love used to strip in seedy bars to support her other love. The love for greater quantities of heroin. Along the way she met another heroin addicted burn out along the way who just happened to be one of the greatest talents in the world and began her menagé a trois with her two sexxxalicious husbands, Kurt Kobain and heroin.
# 3. Lady GaGa
Mylady…Lady Gaga used to have a really bad drug addiction and to support her habit, she used to be a stripper. Now, we dare any of you…and we mean ANY OF YOU, to act surprised by any of this!!
#2 – Catherine Zeta Jones
Catherine Zeta-Jones once was a stripper! She would strip for money before kicking off her acting career. She then confessed that all the money she’d earned a stripper she spent on rhinoplastic surgery and then quit stripping to focus on acting
This is rare. A VERY rare thing. This woman is so flat out beautiful and spectacular? We have nothing to say. While we do not wish death upon anybody? If her cancer riddled husband Michael Douglas was to say slip into a coma tomorrow with no hope of resuscitation? We would mourn for him…it would be in Catherine Zeta Jone’s marble whirlpool bath adjacent to what was now a sweat soak and sex funky bed, however, we would mourn.
The sexiest stripper turned celebrity is:
#1. Brad Pitt
For real though….For REAL though!!! FOR F*CKING REAL THOUGH!!! This man, is so damn, can we drink your month old bathwater full of sweat socks and piss it out on Jennifer Aniston AND Angelina Jolie’s cathedral styled atrium…. sexy? That we would put the holes in the condoms ourselves just to have his baby!
He is sooooooo sexxxalicious? That if we EVER got a chance to blow him in a nightclub bathroom? He better make sure we swallow EVERY THANG!!! Every damn thang!!! Because we are spitting baby…right into a turkey baster!!
Oh, yeah…he used to be a stripper in college.